When Someone You Love Dies

“O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory? The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” 1 Corinthians 15:55-57

First Corinthians 15:55-57 implies that Christ’s death and resurrection have overcome the power and terror of death for Christians. And though this is entirely true, death does hurt both the one dying and the family that has been left behind. Indeed, we will have a new eternal body someday, and being in the presence of a living Christ will be glorious. But let’s not minimize the transition.  I have seen friends and family members experience the emotional trauma of losing a loved one. It is painful and, for many, an experience of loss that is not easily overcome, if at all. It just hurts and will feel like the hurting never goes away. Tears will come in buckets, memories will cascade from remote parts of the mind, and loneliness will set in almost instantly.

If you know someone who is mourning the loss of a loved one, be careful what you say and do. Give hugs, cry with them, send flowers, make a casserole, share a story, and be there for emotional support.

Through my twenties, I worked with high school kids. There was a student named Ray with whom I hadn’t had much contact, but we knew each other and were casual friends. His father died suddenly, and I went to the funeral. Forty-plus years later, Ray contacted me and thanked me for influencing his life. What did I do? I went to his dad’s funeral, hugged him, and told him I was sorry. That was about it. He became a pastor as a second career.

This week (4/7/25), my sister-in-law passed away. Gail is the first from our family’s generation to die, and I experienced seeing the grief and sorrow my older brother was going through. In my early years, Dave was my mentor. We even worked together for seven years. He lost the love of his life, and it hurt in ways that I could do little to help. Until I see Dave face to face, there is nothing I can do but tell him I love him, shed a few tears, keep in touch, and pray.

We have the great promise of eternal life with Christ. We rejoice that some of our loved ones are in the presence of the living God. May we not forget that a hug, a tear, or a listening ear can help the living in ways that words cannot.The gospel message sometimes is simply being there.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. Matthew 5:4